movie film review | chris tookey


2001 - Universal Pictures - all rights reserved
  Musketeer Review
Tookey's Rating
2 /10
Average Rating
3.22 /10
D'Artagnan: Justin Chambers , Febre: Tim Roth, Francesca: Mena Suvari
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Directed by: Peter Hyams
Written by: Gene Quintano, based on the novel The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas

Released: 2001
Origin: US/ Germany
Colour: C
Length: 105

A spectacularly insane attempt to graft incongruous martial-arts techniques on to Dumas' seventeenth-century swashbuckler, The Three Musketeers.
Reviewed by Chris Tookey

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As D'Artagnan, the awesomely wooden, utterly charmless Justin Chambers (pictured left) makes a determined bid for the title Worst Actor on the Planet; and his co-star, Mena Suvari (pictured right), seems equally bent on the title Worst Actress. And as for poor, lugubrious Stephen Rea struggling to play the scheming, dynamic Cardinal Richelieu, it's as painful to watch as Gazza mimicking Sven-Goran Erickson.

Catherine Deneuve turns up as the French Queen Mother, and looks as though she has a nasty smell under her nose. This might be the moronic script but could equally well be the supporting cast, who are beyond woeful, in a startling variety of ways and accents. Tim Roth, who once had a career, turns up as principal villain with a glass eye instead of a performance.

Director-cinematographer Peter Hyams must be thinking nostalgically of the days when he was offered the chance to do classy stuff with proper actors, such as Jean-Claude Van Damme.

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